Sunday, May 16, 2010

I Wanna Be Where You Are(n’t)

“Y’all can’t fade me; y’all need Ambi”

This is gonna sound hella random—even to my standards and y’all know how I do—but I have a question: am I the only one who’s ever wanted to light a match near someone who smells like they’ve bathed in their cologne/body spray/perfume/etc.? Ya know, just to see if they might catch on fire or spark or somethin’ to that effect?
Oh…you haven’t? I guess it’s just another one of thoseNo LauRen/Elle/Ren, it’s just you, sweetie” type things then, huh?
Oh. Well.
The person that was sitting behind me when I went to go see Iron Man 2 yesterday smelled like the inside of a knock-off perfume factory was lucky that I didn’t have my lighter on me. Would’ve left her as a mound of imitation Chanel no. 5 scented ashes. Fxckin’ wit’ my olfactory senses for two hours, bish…
I’m jokin’; sheesh. Lighten up.
But I digress.
Ya girl is currently chillin’ out, maxin’, relaxin’ all bored like on the couch, watching an episode of Criminal Minds and vibin’ to QuESt’s “Where’s My Rhymebook?” mixtape, takin’ a break from doing something mildly pathetic. Which I’m not going into at the moment, but, if you care—and I strongly doubt you do—the details will emerge over the course of the next six months so…yep.
I'm gonna keep this one short because I have other writing to do so, let’s get it.

I hate…
I’m sure that Robert L. Johnson’s intentions were good to better than great when he founded Black Entertainment Television. Positive of that in fact. However, his dream has turned into a nightmare for the Black community. The stereotypes that are portrayed on the network are shameful at best and among the most degrading insults that we as a culture have to deal with. This network and its parent company Antichrist and Illumanati, LLC Viacom delight in showing our people in both a stereotypical and negative light and honestly? The fact that there are people who delight in the coonish—oh yes, I did say coonish—antics and gimmicks that have become synonymous with all things BET irritates and, on a deeper level, saddens me.

See, I told you it would be short.

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